Deserving

You worked hard to get into a good school. You probably went to one of the best school there is. You put in a lot of effort to stand out there. You slogged hard when you could have just chilled out with your friends and may be had a good time. You stuck to the high standards that you defined to be above everything else, even your peace of mind and health, and at times even above people who cared about you.

Maybe you went to that high paying job that everyone else wished they had. You quit that too because it was getting too easy and pointless. You went after work, glory, purpose, money and what not and you wanted to get there fast. Maybe you even had a great start doing that.

But along the way you realize the place you wanted to go had changed and you are no nearer to it than you were one year ago. What is worse is you are no longer sure if there is even anywhere you want to go.

You hoped that in all that effort that you had put in, you were convinced that you *deserved* to be successful, to be content, to be happy, that you would know what you wanted.

Then at a random moment, it hits you. Something you probably knew but never really understood. That it had to be about the journey and not about the destination. That deserve’s got nothing to do with it.

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The value of things

Dustin’s post about ‘The Best’ 

My father usually buys the most expensive of stuff. When he could have got any good color television 20 years back, he went for an imported Sony piece. The washing machine had to be an IFB. When there were two similar shirts in looks, he chose the costlier one

He never buys stuff that is cheap. He doesn’t go to place where one has to haggle.

Until I read Dustin’s post, I never completely understood this nature of his. He wasn’t really buying expensive stuff, he was just buying the best ones there are.

It seems so obvious now. That sony television was replaced in full working condition only for a much bigger screen. The washing machine is still working great for more than 10 years and could do another 10 easily. The shirts that he got me still looks good while the ones I bought are erstwhile.

None of the computers I had, lasted more than a year until I got a Macbook Air. I have spent more on multiple mobile phones whose total value could be of more than an  iphone. None of them were even half as good as the iPhone now.

So that makes my choices ahead really easy. Whenever I am buying a thing, I have to buy the best one there is. If I can’t afford it, then its simply no good to own anything less. And I don’t have to own anything that is not as important.

The things we buy should free us. The real value of a thing is how much it could free us. The best things there are the ones that chains us the least!

Moving on

I don’t hold you responsible any more for what happened to me. It seems silly I have been doing that.

I and only I, am responsible for things that happen to me.

Quoting PG,

Someone who does you an injury hurts you twice: first by the injury itself, and second by taking up your time afterward thinking about it. If you learn to ignore injuries you can at least avoid the second half. I’ve found I can to some extent avoid thinking about nasty things people have done to me by telling myself: this doesn’t deserve space in my head. I’m always delighted to find I’ve forgotten the details of disputes, because that means I hadn’t been thinking about them. My wife thinks I’m more forgiving than she is, but my motives are purely selfish.

So long, and thanks for all the fish.

IPL

Disclaimer: Not an original thought.

Quote from the movie “The Gladiator” –

I think he knows what Rome is. Rome is the mob. Conjure magic for them and they’ll be distracted. Take away their freedom and still they’ll roar. The beating heart of Rome is not the marble of the senate, it’s the sand of the coliseum. He’ll bring them death – and they will love him for it.

Can you think of anything contemporary to this? No?

How about the Indian Premier League?

Boundaries

You think you are someone. You think you know your boundaries – the line that divides the things that you would do and those you wouldn’t. You think you know what you are capable of. And then you think you know the same things about people close to you. You are sure of it. You think you couldn’t be so far from truth.

Do a startup. You realize you are not that someone you thought you were. It was just a mask you were comfortable wearing. The boundaries were just lines that you drew.

This video applies to you too. Not just the world.

The pursuit of Happyness

Disclaimer: The post was written over a few months, so the continuity might be at loss and no, This is not about the Will Smith movie.

So I have been thinking. Why this rat race ? What final purpose does it solve ? If the ultimate goal of life is to be happy, why spend your time in front of computers doing somebody’s work, living somebody else’s life, which you are not sure if it matters at any level or to any one? Why live a life which you are not content about, let alone being excited about it ? What is the point of existence when one really can’t define what is fun ? I mean why can’t one be content with what oneself has ? Why the urge for more ? Or If I may, for Who ?

Do you know how a sine curve looks ? One day I live on the positive peak of it. Work is good, food is good, music I listen is good, Things I do are good. Next day, sometimes same day but on a different hour I am drowning in its negative trench. There are also times when nothing matters. Let the lightning drop next to me, I won’t move a muscle. But there are also times when even touch-me-not plant seems less sensitive. Its no f??king consolation that a lot of people feel the same way.

But off late the amplitude of that sine function has gone down. I stay closer to the normalcy line. The curve seem to have dampened with occasional minor impulses either side of the axis. And at times, I think I have got the big picture, That my purpose does not have any great cosmic significance but only to my own pursuit of happiness, which is nothing but a electrochemical state of the mind brought about by varied stimuli.

Too much thinking is bad for health.